One of the most valuable skills in life and in the workplace is the ability to stand up for oneself.

Without this skill we are at the mercy of the direction others set for us.

That direction is a one way ticket to nowhereville.

😊 It’s difficult to stand up for yourself when your level of power and influence is deemed less than the person you are communicating with.

😊 It’s difficult to stand up for yourself when you don’t have the same level of knowledge as the person you are communicating with.

😊 It’s difficult to stand up for yourself when your point of view isn’t agreed with and/or it is dismissed.

😊 It’s difficult to stand up for yourself, full stop.

As difficult as standing up for yourself is, it is a critical skill to develop.

• When we don’t stand up for ourselves, we are accepting the status quo – someone else’s status quo.
•  When we don’t stand up for ourselves, we are silencing our own thoughts and opinions.
• When we don’t stand up for ourselves, we are allowing the truth of others to become our truth.
•  When we don’t stand up for ourselves, we lose our own inner power and influence which is much stronger than any hierarchical power and influence.

Recently I was reminded of the importance of standing our ground and standing up for ourselves.

I shudder when I think of the number of times I had to stand my ground and stand up for myself at work especially when dealing with those in a more ‘powerful’ position than me.
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I use the term ‘powerful’ in inverted commas as the only power they had over me was because of where they sat on an organisational chart – nothing more, nothing less.

Everyone in a position above me lost power over me every time I left a job – that’s how fleeting and temporary organisational chart power is!
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Every time I stood my ground and stood up for myself,
• My voice would shake
• My hands would sweat
• I would stutter some words
• My back would go into spasm
• My heart would start beating faster
• My breathing became quick and shallow
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I would do my very best to hide all of the above as I didn’t want anyone to see my discomfort.

As uncomfortable as standing my ground and standing up for myself felt in some situations, these uncomfortable feelings never stopped me – never once

• It’s hard going against the grain when you have less ‘power’ in a work situation.
• It’s hard going against the grain when your voice isn’t (deemed) as important in a work situation.
• It’s hard going against the grain in a work situation when you mostly don’t win.
• It’s hard to do all of the above in life in general.

💎 Hard is not a reason to not stand up for yourself.

💎 Hard is not a reason for your valuable voice to be silenced.

💎 Hard is not a reason to stay quiet when you disagree with something.
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Most of the times I stood up for myself against those in more ‘powerful’ positions I didn’t win, the power play against me was almost always too strong.
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Yet I didn’t lose, I learned – I learned very valuable lessons.
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Every time I stood up for myself I learned to build my own power from the inside out.

Every time I stood up for myself I built an inner strength and fortitude that supported me to keep standing up for myself.

Every time I stood up for myself my confidence grew so I could keep standing up for myself and also for others.
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The ability to stand up for oneself is one of the most underrated skills in our personal and professional lives.​
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If we taught ‘standing up for yourself’ in school instead of some of the academic stuff, kids would be better prepared for their adult lives.

I wish I had learned this skill in school, it would have saved me much trial and error and would have avoided many a confrontation at work.
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Standing up for oneself is not an easy thing to do yet it brings more innate power than any organisational chart or any other fleeting external power ever can.
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• Stand up for yourself
• Build your inner power
• Build your inner strength
• Build your inner fortitude
• Build your inner confidence
• Practice it over and over again
• Learn how to do it even when it’s uncomfortable
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Let your voice shake, let your hands sweat, let your words stutter, let your heart beat faster, let your breathing become quick and shallow.
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Feel all these uncomfortable feelings yet don’t let them stop you from standing up for yourself.
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If you don’t stand up for yourself, who will?
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Maggie Smith RIP said it best ‘Speak your mind even if your voice shakes’.
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Thanks for reading
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Siobhain
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